Writers Block

Writers Block

Writer’s Block / Absence

I’ve not written anything here for a while. Rather than come up with some really funny shit about why I’ve not written anything, I thought I’d start with a piece about the disappearance of Jimmy  Hoffa. The main reason for this was that he disappeared into thin air, and for some reason I thought I could link this to the fact that I’ve not blogged for a while. 

Now this is a really piss poor comparison. I mean, he was the President of the International Brotherhood of Teamsters who disappeared under suspicious circumstances – perhaps or perhaps not linked to the mob, and I work on the technology side of marketing and have been on holiday. Miles fucking apart.

That said, in thinking about this I did discover that his middle name was Riddle. Now if ever there was a man who could have disappeared under a cloud it would be a man with the middle name ‘Riddle’; more than that though his name was Jimmy Riddle which is cockney rhyming slang for piddle or taking a piss. Now when Jack Nicholson played Hoffa in the self-titled film in 1992, or when Al Pacino played the same part in The Irishman, at no point did anyone point this out and laugh at either of them. Redrum, Redrum and Say Hello to my little friend may have influenced this.

Now the above should give you some idea as to how my brain works – it is a little inside out and upside down at the best of times, but tonight whilst writing this I have realised that although I have been getting help for my bipolar, it is in fact my wife that is in desperate need of help.

I have completed a session of cognitive therapy which has been absolutely fantastic. I would recommend this to anyone – even if you aren’t stark raving mad. Like I have written before, this type of therapy really does provide you with some useful tools for coping with modern life.

I take medication every day to stabilise my mood so I am not completely insufferable, and through sheer doggedness (not to be confused with dogging), I have managed to start living with bipolar in a much more controlled way. I do sometimes have to go and hide away when I’m not feeling great, but that’s about it these days. Sometimes I just feel a little shitty but I tend to not go off the rails.

I do tend to say some inappropriate shit if I have a couple of drinks sometimes, but I’ve always done that so I’m not going to change now. In my second job, I had to buy apology gifts for my bosses after my first night out with them on the piss as I may have said a few unfiltered things to them. I think they genuinely stitched me up and thought it was quite funny, but I did wake up in the morning with my head in my hands. I have done this sort of thing quite a few times – which my wife will attest to more recently, so I can’t just blame the innocence of youth.

With all of the above said, my wife tonight has gone ghost hunting with my daughter. Now don’t get me wrong, I am a little bit spiritual and believe that there is something out there after death, but I have never woken up one morning and gone – “you know what, I’ll try and track down a ghost so it can scare the shit out of me”. If I want to be scared, I’ll go out in the car with my younger daughter who is learning to drive.

Who is mad now?

Scully

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